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Hello!

Talk about a dry spell. And I’m not talking about the heat in East Texas :)

Really…

If you haven’t heard, I’ve been having major problems with my internet provider. Which is unfortunate, because I can’t even threaten to get it elsewhere – this particular company is the only gig in town for me.

It is what it is.

I’m relearning all kinds of things about powerlessness.

As if I didn’t have enough experience…

In the last couple of years alone – I have had the highest of highs, and lowest of lows. I keep waiting to take that “breath.” The one between life’s challenges. That sigh of relief when you know you can rest, when your shoulders can come down off your ears.

Every victory has been answered with an equal loss.

So, being stripped of my “go-to” forced me to look at things from another perspective, without my charming distractions.

Listening to the Universe has allowed me to experience another spiritual growth spurt.

I feel as if I could burst with the creative energy flowing right now.

I had time (and the desire) to take that breath.

So, I am tentatively stepping back into my office….

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Too much? Ha-ha! Run with it.

I’m a writer – exaggeration is part of my charm.

I’ll be on when I can – as the service allows me – while I wait for the necessary repairs.

I received some cool tablets and brand new mechanical pencils as an early birthday present – which are being put to good use as we speak. Lots of actual work getting done around here!

So many characters to create – worlds to build, and stories to write. I’m having trouble deciding where it’s all going to land next.

I’ll bet it’s exciting though!

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Who’s gearing up for the NanoWriMo?



More Fun In Austin Texas and Other Stuff in Vonnieland

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Wow. It’s the end of October already – where did the time go?

First – I have an announcement from my awesome friends in Austin, Texas! Make sure you mark your calendars for the fun day – and visit their links for more information.

“Howdy LesFic Lovers,

The Lone Star Literary Society is sponsoring one more event this year! Come play LesFic trivia with us! We have lots of prizes for fans and authors to win!!! Here’s the pertinent information:

Date: Saturday, November 15, 2014
Time: 2:00 pm to 4:00 pm
Place: The Genuine Joe Coffeehouse
Location: 2001 West Anderson Lane, Austin TX 78757

The LesFic Trivia Event serves a twofold purpose. It’s an opportunity for fans and authors to mingle and have fun. The event is also a fundraiser to help with expenses for the 2015 Lone Star LesFic Festival.

For LesFic news and updates about next year’s Festival, please check our website and Facebook page:

I’m all ready for NaNoWriMo this year! I have my notes together and my keyboard oiled up (figuratively). If anyone is interested in my progress – my thingy is ymh99.

I’m looking forward to sprinting with ya’ll and all about encouraging people to create.

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Samhain
The entire article is HERE – The Library of Congress – Research Centers

“Halloween had its beginnings in an ancient, pre-Christian Celtic festival of the dead. The Celtic peoples, who were once found all over Europe, divided the year by four major holidays. According to their calendar, the year began on a day corresponding to November 1st on our present calendar. The date marked the beginning of winter. Since they were pastoral people, it was a time when cattle and sheep had to be moved to closer pastures and all livestock had to be secured for the winter months. Crops were harvested and stored. The date marked both an ending and a beginning in an eternal cycle.

The festival observed at this time was called Samhain (pronounced Sah-ween). It was the biggest and most significant holiday of the Celtic year. The Celts believed that at the time of Samhain, more so than any other time of the year, the ghosts of the dead were able to mingle with the living, because at Samhain the souls of those who had died during the year traveled into the otherworld. People gathered to sacrifice animals, fruits, and vegetables. They also lit bonfires in honor of the dead, to aid them on their journey, and to keep them away from the living. On that day all manner of beings were abroad: ghosts, fairies, and demons–all part of the dark and dread.”

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It’s been a long time since I’ve had children in the house to get excited about the holiday. Truthfully, all the commercialism and hype makes me sad.

Maybe it’s my Celtic roots – I get totally squirrely. I can hear you laughing – okay I get WORSE! LOL.
For me – the energy is alive, palpable, and more often than not – overwhelming.

Or maybe it’s because I can see my kids’ faces all made up. Remembering The mornings I got up at 4 am to make them up before daycare – only to get there and see no one else had done the same, and the kids wiping it off.

The year I marched them through an apartment complex. My son was in ICU for pneumonia, Dezi – my oldest was wrapped like a mummy (who fell apart half way through and cried) and my middle child, Kerri-Ann was as green as Kermit could be! I don’t know why that’s the one memory that’s stuck this year – but it is :)

I fed off their excitement. As they got older, it was much easier for me to let others take them out – we didn’t have a car – we didn’t live in a great neighborhood.

They had friends whose parents had both – so I let them go.

Or I was just too damn tired after working as a single mother to keep a roof over our heads and groceries in the cupboard.

I wish I could have some of those holidays back. I would do things differently.

I would worry much less, smile more – and enjoy the little moments that sped by like a locomotive.

Sandy and I now live in a neighborhood now where we don’t have many children.

But I sit by the door anyway, chase them down if I have to – and if I see my child’s face in another little person – I consider myself totally blessed :)


New and Improved Holiday Memories

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Well, here we are – two days and wake up for the brand new year!
time flying
I’ve barely gotten used to typing 2014 – and just realized this is my last post for it :)

First:
Backstory

This was Sandy’s – (referred to hereafter as: The Saint) thirteenth Christmas with me. And I can tell you with complete honesty – the very first I’ve allowed myself – key word, allowed – to truly get in the spirit (instead of pretending) for many years.

I have a point – I do…

“Focus, Yvonne,” I said to myself while swinging my bright red Super-ADD cape off my shoulder.

The old holiday blues started coming on when they put the Christmas stuff out after Halloween.

I began building the wall again.

The one that surrounds and protects how I really feel.

Which was – I wanted everything back the way it used to be. How could I possibly let myself be happy when I’ve lost a child and have no access to my grandchildren? How could I stand being outside and about with all of the frantic-stressed-out-miserable-anything-but-giving-energy?
drowning in energy

Instead of building new memories – I fiercely (and selfishly) clung to the old ones.

Unwittingly, without even considering the people around me and how they felt.

I wanted it different this year!

Fortunately – I have wonderful friends to point out my flaws. That which pisses you off the most – will make you stronger if you choose to listen. It helps when you know without reservation that true friends only have your best interest at heart – and you better really pay attention when it’s more than one friend telling you the same thing.

I was advised to take off my blindfold and ask myself this question:

Where does my suffocating energy go? Who soaks it all up while I’m too busy to notice because I’m feeling sorry for myself for being wrapped in “other’s” emotions?

And the answer was:

The Saint.

I was horrified – I would never hurt her on purpose!

So, here in a public forum – This is the place where I choose to take full responsibility and apologize for unintentionally drowning her every year at this time.
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Along with the knowledge – came responsibility – and the motivation to change.

We both deserve that.

Well mostly, The Saint :)

Did I enjoy myself this year – absolutely! I gave up emotional control (gasp!) and let myself be carried away by The Saint’s Spirit.

change

We went shopping for decorations – in a store… During black Friday weekend.

I was freaking out in a store packed with a couple hundred rude people who were throwing angry-get-out-of-my-way-hate-darts at me, and ended up dancing like a demented ballerina trying to dodge them. I threw handfuls of stuff in the cart without really looking, and began fighting the tears.

I took it very personally up until she said something very important to me. “Just because they’re throwing them doesn’t mean you have to move. You have as much right to be here as they do!”

And she was right. We found an quiet aisle and I took my time to pick out what I really wanted – not what I felt I had to settle for while the crowd roared around me.

I grinned when The Saint gleefully grabbed the last box of lights seconds before the worst offender could get to it, and ignored his bitching. We had the same right to that last box of lights as he did – we were there first. Just because he was really angry didn’t mean I had to give him the box.

We cracked jokes in the loooooooooooong lines. And I found not everyone was a bear inside that store. There was plenty of wonderful people who had the holiday – true holiday spirit. Once again, the Universe points out you get what you put out.
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The Saint hung lights outside, and I had a peacock tree! How cool is that?

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Instead of crying – I made my daughter a butterfly wreath.
butterfly wreath

I focused on giving The Saint the best holiday I was capable of.

I even managed NOT to give her presents early :) Well, except one.

There was plenty of laughter, and love all around.

Everything I needed to know was all written by the joy on her face.

So, here’s to the new memories!

us

It’s going to be an awesome year.

The Deadening: Book Three in the Sisters of Spirits Trilogy comes out in February.

AND I’m working on a romantic comedy :)

I hope you all had wonderful NEW memories to cherish and hold dear!


Get Ready. The Wait is Nearly Over…

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The Deadening: Book Three in the Sisters of Spirits Trilogy is almost in your hands!

It’s time to re-read the first two in the series – and how do I know? Because of the wonderful letters I’ve received that told me several readers were going to do just that :)

I have awesome readers – and I appreciate you!

We started the award winning series with Jordan and Sunny Skye’s story. Book one tells us how Sunny, Tiffany, and Shade, met as children before creating the Sisters of Spirits in The Awakening…(on sale now at Bold Strokes Books) The AwakeningThe Quickening
Then we continued the series with our Tiffany and Kat in The Quickening: Book Two. And after battling more killers, ghosts and demons with the Sisters – that’s where I left all of you breathless and hanging off razor wire.

cracked glass

I’m not at all sorry :)

Why?

Because – we are HERE!

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Just to catch you up:
Shade Stewart is a member of the Sisters of Spirits paranormal investigative group and a self-proclaimed necromancer. Renowned for leaving a trail of broken hearts, she walks between darkness and the light, searching to ease the emptiness in her spirit with women and whatever else might ease the pain. After an explosion leaves her in a coma, Shade is trapped in a place between this reality and her nightmares, fighting for her life and her soul.

Raven Sanchez, a fiery generational witch, is the newest member of SOS. Instantly attracted to Shade and the power she possesses, Raven pursues her, ignoring the darkness that surrounds her. Blinded by her desire, she uses her magic in an attempt to win Shade’s heart, setting in motion forces beyond her control.

Valentine roses for blog

I’m going to think of all of my readers on Valentine’s Day. Really, I am! You don’t have to think about me though – not on that day for lovers :)

… I’d love for you to have your romantic dinners, give gentle kisses, and have your fun with sweethearts. I’d love for you all to spend the night wrapped in love.

Shade and I won’t mind.

Sandy and I will have our night together – and we can all hold our breath and hope Shade is getting some lovin’ right?

We didn’t leave her in a very good place, our Shade, did we?

And we made you wait SO long to hear it.

Are you ready for The Deadening?

ON the very next day – On February 15th, 2015 – Shade would like to tell you her story.

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Leave a comment to enter the drawing – WIN A SIGNED COPY!

Also, Here is a message from Liz McMullen:
Shade never thought she would find someone she could dance with the devil with, until she met Raven. Shade’s story is like her life, with death and darkness tugging at her clothing. The Deadening is finally her time grow, but knowing Shade, she will run from happiness kicking and screaming. Will she be able to save herself, from herself? You’ll have to read the book to find out.”

Liz McMullen, host of The Liz McMullen Show. Check out her website to listen to her interview with Yvonne Heidt on March 27th:

Unfortunately, I can only mail to the US – but if you outside the States and would like to win an E-Copy – please enter for that!

I will announce the winners (by updating this blog) on SATURDAY January, 31st.

Can’t get enough of the Psychics? Check out Sheri Wohl’s page at Bold Strokes Books!

Rosita Peery Won the Drawing! Thank you all for participating! I appreciate all of your kind comments :)


2015 Lone Star Lesfic Festival in Austin Texas

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Howdy!
(That’s my adopted Texas twang ya’ll are hearing!)

MARK YOUR CALENDERS!

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I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again – you can’t meet a stranger at The Lone Star Lesfic Festival.

Unfortunately, due to circumstance – Sandy and I won’t be able to make it this time. I’m very disappointed because this event is near and dear to me and I look forward to it all year.

But here’s the GOOD news.

The Lone Star Lesfic Festival is heading into its seventh FABULOUS year!

It’s being held on Saturday, April 11, for book signings, author readings, panel discussions, giveaways, and more.

Even better?  This event is free!

It’s also being held at a different location:  So, punch it in to your map-quest (or whatever you use.) I am directional-ly challenged even though we have one.

Good thing Sandy is the driver in this relationship.  The damn thing says (in that annoyingly efficient tone “turn right now,” and I’m turning into hay fields and stuff.  Why don’t they say – “turn at the next corner?”

So, I don’t have to drive all the way down a dirt road where billy-gene-bob-ray is spitting tobacco and waving a rifle at me before I can turn around? 

lol

Oh, did you see that squirrel run through here?

stop squirrel

HERE is the new address :)

Norris Conference Center, 2525 W. Anderson Lane, Suite 365, Austin, Texas 78757 (at Burnet Road, Northcross Mall).

There are more than 20 authors attending and the wonderful Lone Star Literary Society in Austin, Texas – is hosting the super event.

HERE is their Facebook link.

If  you haven’t attended one in the past, please do.  I promise you’ll have a blast!


The Tortoise and the Hair

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Top of the Morning to you and all that.

This is one of those occasions that I get to write on a 5th Monday!

I was going to write about building a series – but that’s a subject that isn’t going anywhere and will have as much impact when I write it.  Today I’m going to talk about selfless acts and selfish behaviors.

I’m going to stress here – this is only MY opinion – and may not be true for others.

I consider my depression is selfish.  I try and find my way around in the dark and watch the people who love me most struggle and try to “fix” it.

I struggle to fix it.

I pray and give things to the Universe.  I pretend, post, and do positive things to change my energy.

Let’s put aside the empathy for a second – although it contributes, now that I’m aware and of it and know how to somewhat control it – I’m left with me.

No matter where I go – there I am.

My entire life –  I struggled with addictions and unhealthy behaviors to change the way I think and feel.

And in the end, when I’m done trying to fix myself – I’m still left with the Tortoise meandering it’s path, drawing back into my shell.

It’s okay – I have a point!

Writing gives me escape and healthy characters – for the most part :)  Or at least characters I get to “fix.”

Yay for writing!

I’m wondering why I’m baring my soul.

Maybe – It’s because I feel I can today.

Looking out from behind a metaphorical wool blanket yesterday – I watched my beautiful (inside and out) wife shaving her head – wanting to support women who had no choice in keeping their own hair during their battles with cancer.

I have made decisions that would break your heart – and continue to break mine.

But not this one.

I heard a little voice tell me to “do something selfless”  Make it count.

I have hid behind my hair for decades.  I had the perfect Farrah hair during the perfect time and lived my party days through the 80’s.  My hair has always been my ego’s security.

But you know what?  I listened to that voice – and I feel wonderful.  I feel free and I feel “unselfish” and relieved.

Because people that I love have no choice – they gave it up unwillingly.  And I’m so happy to know that I have it in ME – to show selflessness.

I have an awesome gift of communication – and I can say the perfect things and the perfect time to have the biggest impact.

But this was a gift that needed no words.  I wanted only to show solidarity for my sisters. For the women who feel helpless and scared.  I want this to be a hug for you.

Because today I’m not wrapped in that wool blanket.  I am exposed and vulnerable in a very good way.

My tears and prayers are for YOU today.

So thank YOU for your bravery and sharing your stories with me.  

I appreciate YOU.

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After me


Messing with Mother Nature

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Well, it’s my Monday, and top of the morning to you!

The headlines are screaming with weather and event disasters around the world.

I can’t help but think of that old 70’s commercial:

Now, IF I were a conspiracy theorist – I might say that everything is going nuts because somewhere – somehow – somebody – did something they weren’t supposed to….

Hmm…  I could go there – IF I were a CT.  :)

There is so much information out there – you have to cherry pick (what they believe to be the truth) with caution. AND everyone cherry picks differently according to their own understanding and experiences.

Do I think they’re all true? Absolutely not.

Do I believe there’s a kernel of truth?

The answer is,  yes.

Do the weather patterns affect me physically?  Yes.

Psychically? Absolutely.

That brings me around to a principal of The Chaos Theory: The Butterfly Effect

butterfly effect

“This effect grants the power to cause a hurricane in China to a butterfly flapping its wings in New Mexico. It may take a very long time, but the connection is real. If the butterfly had not flapped its wings at just the right point in space/time, the hurricane would not have happened. A more rigorous way to express this is that small changes in the initial conditions lead to drastic changes in the results. Our lives are an ongoing demonstration of this principle.”

You can find the entire article HERE.

Again, IF I were a CT – I would be concerned people are messing with the earth’s natural balance – for their own gain.

harp

And there is too little room in one little blog to explore this.

As an author of fiction? Don’t these times bring a thousand ideas to explore and write about?

Another resounding, yes.

How many science fiction authors “created” scenarios and worlds that were so far fetched at the time – and now those ideas are a reality?

I can twist myself up a hundred ways on these thoughts that race a million miles a minute.

I do want to extend my condolences to the people who are going through these disasters. That’s real.

I also want to extend my congrats to all the Golden Crown Literary Award Finalists.

I am humbled and honored to be included this year for The Quickening: Book two in the Sisters of Spirits Series :)

The Quickening

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Go Andi and RG!

And can I say how proud I am to be a part of All You Can Eat as well?

Because I totally am!

I’ve been blessed to meet so many women that are part of the lesbian book industry – and I wish I had the room and patience to congratulate them all personally – but I don’t today.

WHY?

Because…

I’ve sat here and looked at this message for two hours before posting….

Google Chrome (not responding.)

*Sigh.

Another crazy morning :) And I get to work on something I love.  I’m blessed.

Have an awesome day.

And stay safe.


Heroes and Hindsight

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Heroes and Hindsight.

I thought it fitting that the second part of my blog would fit on Women & Words. The overwhelming support and love from ya’ll – shocked me.

Really.

And that’s putting it mild. :)

If you want to read the down and dirty details of my heart attack on June 3rd – and how I felt about it that day – here is the link to Heart attacks and Helicopters.

So, let’s break it down. At that point – I was anything but grateful to be alive. I was pissed off – in pain, and let everyone who was around me know about it. That alone is worth mentioning as I’m not someone who makes a public fuss.  Goes back to “be sweet, considerate, but above all, be invisible.”

Seen but not heard.  Don’t put anyone to any “trouble” on your account.

Here’s the important thing. I told the truth.  What if, someone else in this situation – felt this way, then decided they shouldn’t because it wasn’t “socially” acceptable or the people around them made them feel guilty for being ungrateful – they would think something was wrong with them, right?

I have put myself in situations I’d rather not admit to – but if I see someone struggling with the same challenges, I always tell the truth.  Even if it makes me look “bad.”

We are not as alienated as we think. :)

Or I’m not, anyway.

Back to the hospital – after my surgery. We’ve established I had a “real” heart attack.

Poor Sandy shows up white as a ghost (she actually saw one in the ICU bathroom as well) but that’s another story.

The IV is still in my shin – and they come and talk to me about DNR. Of course, I tell them – don’t.  At the time, I could only picture more spikes screwed into my bone marrow and my chest getting cracked open while i was awake.  Sandy said I looked at her with complete panic and said “Don’t make me.”

I’m not making light of this – I was utterly selfish.

In hindsight – the pain is what kept me focused and alive.  It’s going to take a long while to feel grateful, but the seeds are there.  I couldn’t imagine being in Sandy’s position either when she said, “I won’t make you.”

That’s love.

Sandy was making the phone calls to the family, updating everyone.  It was all very surreal.

Still is.

Then I was blown away.

From the moment I woke after surgery – until this day. The outpouring of love and support brought me to another place during this time.

My sister from another mister opened an account to help me pay for this impromptu stay at the hospital. My wife read the comments that were dropping onto my Facebook page, well-wishes from all around the world.

My friends and author buddies posted and reposted updates and the link to the hopsital.

Wow, I mattered – I really, really mattered.

Sorry, Sally Field moment….

You see, when you’re depressed and in denial – you can’t remind yourself that you’re In denial – and or being influenced by depression.

Go ahead and read that again.  :)

I want to say that the skies opened up, the clouds parted, and I saw healing Angels.

I want to.

But I’ve established that I hadn’t seen the light, Deserae, or any of my relatives who’ve passed on.

I started getting oxygen to my brain.

And I believe in the power of prayer and positive energy.

Here’s more hindsight.  I’ve touched people in a way that was invisible to me – my words and compassion to other’s  in the past took on a life ot it’s own.  I’ve planted seeds (actually, it’s more like I unknowingly  scattered them willy-nilly behind me…)

But that’s my style.

Your genorisity with your words and financial donations floored me – it was beyond belief.

Sandy and I spent most of my hopsital stay with our mouths wide open in shock.

What I feel today is beyond gratitude – beyond appreciation – beyond words, really.

And I’m a writer who is again without words big enough to express herself.

Thank you doens’t seem enough.

But it’s all I have :)

I have amazing friends.

Really, who gets to know the depth of how so many people feel about you before they die?

It’s totally life changing and awesome!

I’m the luckiest woman alive :)

Life life

I have my first follow up appointment today.  But I really want to share this as well…

Because now, I do what I want…

LOL.  Have an awesome day :)

Vonnie

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Bungee cords and The Committee

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Has it been a month already?  The time flies and all that :)

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I’ve done some soul searching, you know – thinking about the stuff you’re supposed to after a heart attack. I came to some excellent conclusions.

There is no time to waste here.  “Someday” isn’t an option as it was when I was younger – Or more importantly, pre-heart-attack.

Time to stop procrastinating.

The time is now – right now – and now…

you get the picture :)

I’ve split my life into before and after – yet again.

When I look back – I can remember all these huge life events and see them as if I’m a different person.

It’s because I am :)

And my perception has changed again.

maya-angelo-quote

All of this sounds wonderful, yes?

I had two whole glorious months while the committee was silent.

My skin fit, I accepted life on life’s terms, and all that wonderful stuff that well adjusted people know instinctively. With the generous outpouring of love and support from my friends and family – and online friends and family – I felt invincible and accepted. None of that crap in my head mattered. You truly find who and what’s important in a life and death situation.

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Overnight, I had lost my insecurities.  I compared things in my mind with this statement in mind…  “Would this (insert situation) matter if I was flat on my back in the ambulance again?”

And the answer is always, no.

There are so many things that I’d like to change and I don’t feel as if I have “someday” to fall back on.  I’m really feeling my mortality.

I missed my deadline for my new rom-com, Along Came Aislin.

I love deadlines

Can’t feel remotely good about that. Even if my health has kept me down.

I have new ideas daily. Then I get depressed because I don’t feel as if I have enough time to write them. And I can’t (or don’t feel as if) I can work on new stories when I haven’t finished that one.

Oh loooook, guilt… You can take the girl out of the catholic school – but you can’t take the catholic out of the girl.

AAAAAND like a rubber band that’s stretched and released – the committee comes rushing back.

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Evidently, like most things I’ve thought I’ve let go of – the insecurities had a bungee cord attached!

So, do insecure people write? or does writing make us insecure?

Then I find something like this:tumblr_nb1151hPNA1twav8oo1_1280

So now I’m a cliche – ha-ha!

The thing about not writing for a while is this: it gets harder and harder to throw myself back in to a story.  Any story.  I spent the time reading a hundred books or so. But the unfinished one haunted me daily.

I thought about giving up writing. And being remembered for Sometime Yesterday and my Sisters Trilogy – Saving myself from all the crap the committee and I do to myself in the process. I have a hundred excuses all lined up.

Then I realize:  I don’t have to have any.  It’s as simple as, do I want to write?  Forget all of the publishing drama I put myself through.  Do I want to tell stories?

The answer is, yes – I do!  There will be changes – there has to be for my sanity – but I can handle them IF I go back to my daily question….

Is this going to matter…

The good news is I’ve opened my laptop (after having had to get it fixed – again) and fell in love with Aislin all over again.

It’s classic Yvonne humor – and I love it.

She’ll be fashionably late – but I hope ya’ll fall in love with her as well.  I’ll battle the committee and bungee cords again – because the end result is what I love – sharing my stories with readers!

Have a great day.

Congrats to all of the Goldie Winners!  

And I’ll leave you with this – I’m truly honored that The Quickening, Book Two in the Sisters of Spirits trilogy was a finalist in the Paranormal category.  How cool is it to see your book on the big screen?

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Very cool!  


Procrastination OR Pick One Damn it

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Like many other bloggers, I’ve had a hard time coming up with an idea for mine.

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It seems each time it’s my turn, I put myself in the “slice of life” and “Where do you come UP with this stuff?”

Let’s add that during the month – I’m inspired to write about several subjects.

Comes time to write them – and I’m faced with the white screen.

But, am I having a hard time because I don’t have anything to say?

Nope.

Women and Words is an excellent site for authors and writing advice.  It might be nice if I actually wrote some writing tips.

Instead, I ramble about myself, and what’s going on in my life…

Let me also add that my heart attack did NOT give me a longer attention span – in fact – I’d say I have an even shorter one.

Seriously? What’s shorter than a gnat on crack?

I got this picture off “Blogging for the Short Attention Span.”

data porn

I was appalled when it was suggested ADD is reflective of “data-porn.”

shocked_face

On one hand I was all like –

Did you have to put it like that?

And on the other –

Oh, that is SO true!

See? Now, I’m totally off base – again. :)

And I’ve forgotten MY POINT!

Oh – there’s a lesson here: A WRITING one!

Write when you’re inspired – if you’re like me – you won’t remember what it is you wanted to write about when you were inspired!

OR you might find yourself so close to deadline, you can’t do the subject justice.


Of which I’ve been guilty of in the past…

embarrassed

I have so many ideas – I write snippets down. Then I write more – and more – still more.

Snippets that is.

Several ideas are next up to bat – so many in fact – I’m having a hard time deciding what the next book should be.  I may just put them all in a hat and choose one!

Oh LOOK! …

squirrel

He’s been going to Cardio Camp with me…

Sigh, it seems I’m done now.

Have an excellent week!

Happy birthday to my son, Daniel :)


The House on Fourth Street – Revisited

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That which doesn’t kill us – makes us stronger.

So they say.  Now that I’m on this new journey, it’s time to revisit that which terrified me – so I can conquer it.

Fourth Street – I was so scared of it, that after I wrote this series, I deleted all after having nightmares about it!

I thought I had destroyed all the copies – but with the wonder of the internet – I ran across it…

Coincidence?  I’ll let you decide.

One of the most haunted houses I’ve ever lived in was – scratch that. THE most haunted house I’ve ever lived in was on 4th street in Bremerton, Washington. We lived there for almost three years, but I couldn’t find any pictures but this one of the stairs leading up to it. Fortunately, it’s creepy enough to set the stage for my story.

Every house I’ve lived in has been haunted to some degree, but the house on 4th street is where I received most of my inspiration for the hauntings in my books. If I need a particularly spooky scene, I just remember what it was like to live there.

Every neighborhood has that house. You know, it’s the one the kids won’t play in front of, the one people cross the street to avoid. This was one of those. Set up and way back from the street hidden by trees, bushes, and tall grass. A yard that held secrets and not one of them would be anything you’d want to know.

Now, I’d driven by this particular house for years and never noticed it. It was that invisible. Almost as if it was shrouded and it gave off the energy to stay the hell away.

We were looking for a house and had very limited funds. More like zero funds. There was a gentleman I had worked for in the past that owned several rentals and he just happened to have one come available. He liked me enough that he wouldn’t require any deposits or additional money. There was just one hitch. The previous renters had left in a hurry; and without most of their belongings.

Sounded like a good trade – no first month’s rent, and no deposits in exchange for a good cleaning. What a deal, right? I made this deal sight unseen because we needed a place to live yesterday.

We were to meet him at the house. We parked on the street and I remember getting chills as we pulled up and saw the house for the first time. After we climbed the creepy stairs it was a hike to the front door on a steep cracked cement walkway. The house was painted deep purple. Yes, egg-plant purple. The windows were so dirty, you couldn’t see inside. My new landlord stood at the open door. The light didn’t seem to penetrate into the house – it looked like a black hole.

Waiting.

I looked at Sandy and said, “Somebody died here.”
Her eyebrows went up. “Really?”
I nodded. I was sure as I’ve ever felt before. Even if at that time in my life, I wasn’t as confident in my gifts – I knew I was right and I so didn’t want to go in. But really, we didn’t have a choice. It was either move here or be homeless. Sandy went in first while I hung on to her back belt loop.

Oh. My. God.

The air was stale, almost suffocating. Words can’t describe the mixture of urine, cat, dog, and wet wood. Revolting is the best I can come up with. Somewhere underneath all of those scents was a lingering coppery smell. Death. I was urgently hoping that was a just a psychic impression of blood, and that I wouldn’t really find any.

It was freezing cold. The smell was horrific. The dirt was worse. Even with windows and the open door, I had to let my eyes adjust to see. I began to shiver and feel sick to my stomach but I smiled weakly and nodded for Sandy’s sake. Remember – I wasn’t at all sure of my abilities – I had too many doctors in the past tell me I was I was crazy.

I could put on my big girl panties and deal with it. I was almost sure I could. Sandy didn’t seem too affected and I didn’t want to freak her out – yet.

It was only a one bedroom house with two more finished rooms in the basement (which was completely underground mind you – no windows). Very small – like garage small. Well, I’d lived in worse and made it pretty. So I began to plan in my head what I could do with it to make cozy. I’m really good at putting lipstick on a pig, been doing it all my life.

The bedroom was also full of stuff. I kept getting the feeling of being watched from the small closet area but continued to try and ignore it. I pulled out some paper from my purse and began making a list. Garbage bags, 4 boxes. Bleach, Pinesol. Then I walked into the kitchen. It was so tiny, it could have been a closet. But it did have a nice window looking over the side yard. Yellow, I could paint it yellow. See? I could do this!

Nice sized linen closet – who doesn’t love extra storage right?

On to the bathroom. The first thing I see is the window is painted over. What? John explained it’s because they enclosed the back stairs to the basement. Okay, I wrote down, make curtains for bathroom. Then I turned and saw the mirror was painted black.

That’s downright scary.

I did not want to be in this room. I felt incredibly scared, sad, and I really wanted to throw up. But not in that commode, I’m not. I don’t think it had been cleaned in five years or more, and neither had the old claw foot bathtub. No shower attachment. Still making the best of the situation, I wrote mirror on my list.

Onto the basement – only cellar would be a better description, the kind with cold and damp cinder-block walls. The feeling only got worse as I descended the very narrow and steep concrete stairs. The spider webs were atrocious.

I’m not kidding when I say this was a creepy, scary, place.

I resist the urge to run right back upstairs. Barely. I was nearly paralyzed physically by my fear. But we had two kids living with us at that time; my adult daughter, Dezi, and Sandy’s daughter, Ashley, who was a still a young teenager. They were going to have to sleep down here, (after I painted and scrubbed) and if I showed one iota of fright, they would never come down. The finished rooms were behind a dividing wall that had a wood stove in front of it and workbench/tool area for Sandy in the front. She was pretty pleased about that, so I kept quiet. I rationalized that once it was cleaned up, it could be cute.

I’m pretty good at lying to myself.

I added: Brillo pads and bug bombs.

I finished my list, shook hands with my new landlord, and walked as fast I as I could to our truck. Which was difficult to do on a 35 degree walkway! I had to lean back to not fall on my face. Later that night, we were packing and an old friend of mine came over. I told him where we were moving to.

“Wow,” he said. “The purple house on the hill, right? The one they call the witch house?”

“What’s wrong with it?” I really didn’t want to know, I really didn’t want to.

“You know my buddy, John?”

I shook my head.

“His son died in that house.”

Let’s recap. The purple house on the steep, overgrown hill, nick-named the “witch house,” gave me psychic impressions of death at first sight, had black painted mirrors, was full of garbage, smells, hadn’t been cleaned in years, was spider infested, AND – oh yeah, my buddy just told me a child died there.

Caught up? Good, that was just the first walk-through.

When my friend told me John’s toddler son passed (drowned in the tub seven years prior), I’m not going to lie, there was a teensy part of me that felt vindicated because I knew someone passed away before I even stepped inside. Another part of me, the terrified little girl, wanted to change my mind about moving, but again, we had no choice. I wasn’t brave, just desperate!

I was completely heartbroken for the parents because of their child’s untimely death. I tried to rationalize that all babies went straight to heaven, right? How dangerous could a young spirit be? I forced myself to hold an image of flying cherubs in my mind even as I knew, deep down, there was much, much, more in that house.

Angels don’t make your skin crawl.

I wish I had “before” pictures, but I don’t. We didn’t own a digital camera. We bought the disposable ones, you know – the ones you use, send back in a special envelope, and they send you a new one? I also have kids that like to take my pictures and put them in their own collections.

Anyway, back to the story. Sandy and I marched up the steep walkway the next morning, leaving the kids to pack at the old place. We were armed with a ton of cleaning supplies, buckets, and towels. I remember it being a very pretty day. The house set on a double lot, and the empty side looked like a fairy garden, weeping trees, a giant hydrangea, and an overgrown wooded area, surrounded by thickets of blackberry bushes. Here is a recent picture of the renovated lot today – it’s not the same house, (that was a purple garage-sized box) the yard has been graded and leveled somewhat from its super-steep incline – but it IS on the same foundation. The cement on the right side is a spooky garage cut into the hill. More on all this later.

The first thing we did was open all the windows and doors, then we set up a fan to try and draw some of the smell out. We couldn’t paint until we cleaned the walls and removed the garbage. We owned a little extended Ford truck at the time. Sandy began working on clearing some of the blackberry bushes so we could pull the truck in behind the house from a small alley driveway.

First up for me – the bathroom. I pulled the painted mirror off the wall and began cleaning the commode. If we were going to be working – we needed a clean bathroom. Oh, joy. After I finished that hour long (not exaggerating) chore, I was scrubbing the wall that separated the bathroom from the closet in the bedroom and began hearing knocking. Three, then two, then one really loud bang that had me jumping off the chair I was standing on in the bathtub. I thought (prayed) maybe Sandy was putting some boxes in it. I called out for her.

No answer.

You know that feeling that creeps up from the base of your spine, travels up your back, and lifts all the hair on your entire body?

Yeah, that.

I’m pretty sure petrified is a good word for it.

This time I scream for Sandy, and she comes running in – from the freaking back-yard. God, I love her. She stalked on into the bedroom and checked out the closet with no hesitation. If she was scared, she didn’t show it, not one iota. She’s awesome that way.

“Honey, there’s nothing here.”

My inside voice was screaming – Oh, YES there is! I also remember thinking if I had to throw up, at least the sparkling commode was handy. My scalp was tingling like crazy. I’m already freaked out because of the death in the room I was cleaning – now I had to act brave and follow her into the bedroom. There was a distinct temperature difference from one room to the other. Freaking awesome. Not.

Out of the corner of my eye, near the closet, I see an old woman shaking a fist at me. But the harder I tried to concentrate, the faster she slipped away – until I was wondering if I saw her at all. It could have been my “over-active” imagination. At least that’s what I used to call it back then. I told Sandy I was fine, she could leave the room. I waited until she was out of it before I yelled into the closet. Sandy’s very accepting and all, but still –we’d only been together a year at that time – and I wanted the relationship to last many more. The last thing I wanted for her to do was have her run screaming out the door – from me.

“I’m cleaning the place damn it! Leave me alone.” I waited for an answer, but nothing happened. Thank God. I had just gone back into the tiny hallway when the front door slammed shut. (Good thing I used the bathroom, huh?) Keeping my pants dry didn’t stop the scream from tearing out of my throat though. The door opened immediately and I about had a heart attack where I stood. My youngest daughter, Kerri, walked through it. She had her own place but came over to help us clean. All three of my kids are/were sensitive, I didn’t tell her anything about the place, because I wanted her first impression.

She stood in the middle of the ransacked living room and snapped her gum a few times while she looked around. “Oh, wow.” Then she turned back to me. “You know someone died here, right?”
I’m pretty sure my eyes bugged out while I nodded.
“Nice place mom. You didn’t tell me we were gonna need a dumpster and a fumigator.”
I could tell she wanted to change her mind about helping and I didn’t blame her one bit. Let’s be honest, I really didn’t want my kids there. It was that bad.
“You also didn’t mention the old lady that just ran out of the bedroom.” She cheerily waved to a spot behind me.

Oh. My. God.

I chose to ignore her and instead forced a weak smile. “Did you bring supplies?”
She held up some paper towels and bottle of Windex. “I kind of feel like I brought a knife to a gun fight.” But she was made of pretty stern stuff then. She put her purse down and asked where she should start.

I still had to finish the bathroom so I told her to go ahead and start bagging things up in the living room. Picture the previous tenant being a hoarder and that should help with the visual quite well.
She snapped her gum again. “Okay, got any gloves? Because, I’m not touching this sh*t with my bare hands.”

“Go ask other Mom.”

I really didn’t want to be there any longer that day. But I had to get it clean before Sandy could paint. We had only two days before we had to be out of our other house. So, I finished the bathroom as quick as I could. I’m not even going to go into the nasty stuff in the cupboards in that room – but I will tell you that the chore involved two paint scrapers (I broke the first one), some nail polish remover, and bug spray.

Kerri found a radio and plugged it in. Hey, the hoarder left something useful.

Just. Awesome.

Three HOURS later, I completed the bathroom, and then joined my daughter in the living room. She had made good progress – there was a clear path to one of the walls that needed to be cleaned. I brought a bucket of bleach, a long handled mop, and scrubbies over to it. Cleaning progressed. The smell of bleach (I was on my third gallon by this time) chased both Kerri and Sandy out of the house. I was left alone – again.

Writing this blog has turned out to be a bit cathartic for me. I’m going into much more detail than I originally thought I would and we just walked in the door on 4th Street.

I finished the one wall, grabbed the fourth (and last) gallon of bleach I’d brought, and went to move an old garbage bag out of my way before starting on the second wall. Actually, I kicked at it – and several books went flying out and across the dirty floor.

I saw a couple of the covers and filled with a cold dread. My stomach twisted painfully, and I fought back bile while I yelled (screamed) for Sandy. She came running upstairs holding a full garbage bag from the basement. I pointed to the visible titles.

Demonology.
The Art of Black Magic.
Summoning Shadows and Lesser Demons.
The History of Dark Witches and Demons.
Romanian Curses.

I watched Sandy turn white as a sheet before she opened the bag from the basement – and pulled out several black hooded robes.

I ran straight out of the front door and collapsed on the dead lawn.

We’re still only on the FIRST day here folks!

Next month – More Fear on 4th Street.

For some reason, the blog won’t let me put the pictures on today….

Welcome to my world :)
Have a great day!


Fourth Street – Revisited with Pictures

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Hello everyone!

My internet is being persnickity since the storm, so bear with me.

If you’d like to read the first part of this series –  here is the link to Fourth Street Revisited.

I wasn’t able to post pictures that day because of said bitchy internet so…

Here are the stairs to the haunted house.

fourth street stairs

No, I’m NOT kidding either!  This was the house the kids wouldn’t trick or treat at. We set candy OUT on the walkway so they wouldn’t have to walk to the door – nope, uh-huh – they wouldn’t touch it!

Here is what the house looks like today – when we lived in it – it didn’t have the second story.

fourth street houseTo the far left of this picture is the spooky garage that cut into the hillside – but that’s another story for later….

Okay – now I’ve set the scene – here are pictures of the orb streams that followed my daughter and I around the house. I destroyed mine a long time ago when I saw them developed. My daughter won’t mind that I share hers. :)

Remember – we didn’t see these at the time – just hearing voices and knowing something was there.

orbstream 3 4

ghost orbs

Looks like my dog,  Missy, is screaming :)  I have stories of Missy as well.  Here is one: She would sit in the living room and howl into the corner when she was only 5 weeks old – and then “talk” to the window.  It was so scary.
kerri and stream of orbs

Mine were worse – here is one that I DID find where there is “something” coming out of the wall – and around my face. I kept this because my son and Sir William is in the picture.hands out of wall

AND last, but not least today – is the very scariest….

Look behind the door behind Sandy…

I don’t know what you see – but I see a young boy (remember the death?) behind the door. Only this is NOT a sweet face.

I couldn’t get it any bigger where the pixels didn’t distort -maybe you have to see the original.  But you won’t change my mind about what I see!

After everything we’ve seen and heard in this house anyway.

face behind the door

So, I want to get this up before the internet acts up again.  I have more stories – never fear…. :)

Have an awesome week.

Yvonne :)


Honesty Above All

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Good Lord, I blinked and 2015 passed me by.

2015 over

For those readers waiting for more chapters on my ghost adventures – fear not – I haven’t forgotten you!

It’s reflection time today…

I  say each year that it’s been a cycle of very highs and very lows.

And each year the graph of my experience goes higher – then comes down again even lower.

This is what I refer to as “yay-boo’s”  And this last year was no exception.

absent2

I’m going to be painfully honest – because – I’ve been, for all intents and purposes – largely absent this year.

And if I’ve learned anything this lifetime, it’s that I’ve been put on this earth to have experiences in severe contrast and survive to tell about them.

I’ve had quiet a few close calls.  Situations I should not have walked out of – alive or at least not in one piece.

I can’t even pretend I was present in the first six months of 2015 either. The Deadening released in February, and I’ve written less than 25,000 words since then.

Some of you can imagine the self-talk involved.  Lazy, worthless, procrastinator, and the list goes on, fill in the blanks for self-hatred.

And if you don’t know how that feels – I’m very happy for you!

I had a bad heart and didn’t know it.

The heart attack emotions came way after the event itself. For the first two weeks – those criticizing voices were very silent – and I felt vindicated.

I told you I didn’t feel well…

All of the love I received during that incident – was awesome – but I totally didn’t feel as if I deserved it.

opiatewithdrawals

I’m just going to throw this on the table… Because I’m not in a place where it will embarrass anyone but myself.

I was an addict in denial.  And really, who wants to admit to their readers, fans, and friends that they’re addicted to pain killers? Who wants to admit that they spent ten years addicted to meth?

Thank Heaven – I haven’t touched that in eleven years…

There are always going to be people who judge and I’ve ran into a lot of them during my life. But I can’t let that stop me here – because If I don’t tell on myself – It will kill me.

If I feel that I have to live two separate identities – It will kill me.

So, I’m going to make this clear. My name is Yvonne, I am a mother, wife, an author, and today, a struggling addict reaching for recovery.

I say reaching because opiate withdrawal is the worst I’ve ever experienced. I don’t wish it on my worst enemy.

BUT – I have many more good days than bad recently.

And it’s because I remembered this very important message…

attract what  you put out

Today I choose to celebrate my successes – and try NOT to criticize and practice self-hatred – because it only brings more of it.

Do I have more energy – no.

Do I absolutely hate that – yes!

But I’m clean today and that makes it a successful one!

There’s work to do.

Finding my confidence again is one.

Getting back to writing follows.  It’s my joy – and my calling.

Thanks for listening – and if you understand – that’s even better.

And yes, my wife Sandy – IS  a saint.

Here’s to 2016 :)

And… new beginnings.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


Things We Lost in the Fire

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It’s hard to believe it’s the fourth Monday in February already. But – the calendar says it’s so…

Since last June – third to be exact  – I haven’t written anything of consequence.  I’ve tried, believe me.

But that isn’t what I was going to blog about.

Well, I don’t think anyway – we’ll see where the blog takes me….

ADD3

Just a reminder of how my brain works!

Since I haven’t been writing – I’ve been doing those Pinterest projects I’ve pinned and/or lusted over.

I’m a creative person – and I MUST create – whether it’s writing or making something of bits and pieces of stuff in my garage – I feel I have to.  It’s in my nature.

create

Consider the following synonyms :)

Build * Conceive * Constitute * Construct * Design * Devise  * Discover  * Establish  Set-up  * Shape  * Spawn  * Start  * Actualize  * Author  * Beget  *Coin * Compose Concoct  * Contrive  * Effect   * Erect   * Fabricate   * Fashion   * Formulate   * Hatch Imagine * Institutes   *Invents   * Occasions   * Originates  * Parent   * Procreate  * Rear  Sire* 

* Bring to Pass.  * Bring into being.  * Bring into Existence.   *Cause to be.  * Dream up.   Give birth to   *Give life to.

I’m amazed at all the birth references – and anyone who’s given birth can relate to the pain of it all.

fairy garden doorIMG_20151120_153714_hdr_kindlephoto-87057276sign with birds

Here are only  a few that I’ve worked on. As you can tell, I’m totally in love with the blue accents. Actually, I’m kind of obsessed. :)

I was admiring the colors when I had a thought about a framed print I used to own that had tones of the same color.  I bought it in 1997, and at the time, it was the most I’d ever spent on a decoration of any kind.

Unfortunately – when Sandy and I lost everything in a house fire in 2004 – the print and its matching set were destroyed. I hadn’t seen the same ones up until last week.

(Yes, it’s the Fourth Street house that burned down!) But that’s another story.

I was wishing I had the print again because it would look SO nice with the signs and furniture I had redone. Then I put it to the back of my mind – because really -who wants to remember all the stuff they lost in the fire?

But wait!  Here is where the Law of Attraction made an appearance in a major way.

Two days after wishing I had the print again – Sandy and I were in a thrift store and I had walked up and down all the aisles I was interested in. I stood at the cash register and looked up.

IMG_20160215_131505_hdr_kindlephoto-19281676

THERE it was! 

In immaculate condition as well. I could hardly believe my eyes – but at the same time I was nodding to the Universe, giddy with gratitude.

I told the cashier the story – while the nice young man climbed the ladder to get it down for me….

She too, had lost everything in a fire in the past.  Then she asked me if I wanted it half price!

Well of course I did.

But I would have bought it at full price – just to remind myself I create my own reality and if I’m plugged in – this kind of stuff happens all the time!

How cool is that?

In addition – since I’ve been staring at a white screen for months while Macy, the muse, is out trolling – maybe I’m trying to write the wrong book for now.

As soon as I made THAT realization – here comes fully formed characters jumping into my head and playing the drums on my temples.

It’s hard putting away something I’ve been working on for a long time – but I’d rather do that and keep writing,  than play hooky with Macy.

As soon as she figures out I’ve sidestepped her – she’ll come back!

Have an awesome week and thank you for stopping in.


Ghost Search Leap Year 2016

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It’s leap year!

frog_2153983b

Sorry, I couldn’t resist that picture :)

Here is a link to interesting facts about leap  year. I’ve combed the internet and found most of the information is repetitive. Now, just because I didn’t know most of it – doesn’t mean YOU don’t. Then again – I live my life in a self-imposed bubble!

So in the interest of boredom (yours) I’m going to off in a Vonnie-land direction.

What interest me?  Ghosts and Everything Paranormal.

What ghosts are famous on Leap year?

I took it step by step and searched Google.

The first thing I found was a Korean movie – called, appropriately (and exact google match) The Curse of Febuary 29th. 

I want something a little closer to home.

The Call of Duty game – has been rumored to be leaked to the public on Today’s date.

Mmm. No quite what I’m looking for…

Here is a video – that was actually filmed on 12/27 – and viewed several times today.  “Woman gets pushed to the floor by a ghost.” 

Which begs the question – Who else is looking for ghosts today?

I may need to redefine my search.

Found one! This one from Haunted Places: The National Directory: Ghost Abodes, Sacred Sites By Dennis William Hauck. Found On Google Books.  

“On February 29th, 1704, a band of fifty Frenchmen and two hundred Abenaki and Caughnawaga Indians attacked Deerfield. (Massachusetts.)  The war party slaughtered 49 settlers and captured 111, of whom 20 died on a two-hundred mile journey forced march into Canada”

It’s said that a pregnant woman who was slaughtered (and scalped) on that day haunts the only survivor who made is way back from Canada, John Williams. It’s also reported that her wailing can be heard every leap year from the Old Deerfield Cemetery where she is buried.

This is more of what I’m looking for – not the gore of course, but the famous ghosts who inhabit February 29, leap years.

I was  going to talk about a demon Goddess named Chuang-Mu – but the site blocked me due to a virus on mystic investigations. I had to find another source which turned out to be A character on a role playing board!

Stymied.

There is a haunted castle in Ireland called Leap Castle. But again, although super creepy, has nothing to do with leap year.

Ghost-at-Leap-Castle_photo_mediumleap castle

And last today – but certainly not least (and not about leap year) – but came up in my search. One of the pictures breaking the internet.

ultrasound

Can you see it?  Believe me once you do, you can’t unsee it.

ultrasound2

Interesting note.  I went to credit the link and it disappeared?  Leap year Paranormal?

I’ll let you decide!

So there was a few hours (Truly. You have no idea how many links I hit, and got distracted on.) of my search for ghosts on Leap year -and really, I didn’t find many. I really wanted to.

Do you know of any famous ghost stories on this day?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 



Reminder Lone Star Lesfic Festival

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Hey Ya’ll

Hope you had a great holiday.

I’m reminding our readers of the Lone Star Lesfic Festival next weekend in Austin Texas!

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More information on their webpage:)

But that isn’t all – if you haven’t checked out their Facebook page – there is a LOT more fun posted there!  Here is the link!

I’m so sorry to say I won’t be able to attend this year – even though I planned on going and being a part of!  I’m going to miss all of the fun again.  It’s a long story – but unavoidable.

BUT – I’ll be there in spirit (get it?) and I’ll cross my fingers and toes that I’ll be able to see my friends soon.

Take lots of pictures – I’d love to hear from you how your day was!

 

 

 


GCLS and the Shocked Author

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We’ll do this in sections (maybe) ‘cuz I tend to let my ADD have creative control. Mostly because I’m unaware until I laugh out loud at myself. Ha-ha!

Say cheese! 8a70a0d19a8f15cef1f3f3da6c671e5a

OMG that baby is SO cute!  And has more real teeth than I do… (LOL) Oh wait, that’s my cue.

See?

I finally got a smart-phone – which of course, I had to push myself to be smarter than.  BUT it has this really cool app that I can put notes in, such as “Write this blog…”  And you know what’s really funny?  I don’t even remember putting them in…

No guilt on me – I blame my health!

Vonnie-girl, REFOCUS!

So, I was SUPER honored to be a paranormal finalist in the Golden Crown Literary Awards  this year! After the year I’ve had – it did a whole lot for my confidence to keep writing, as I hadn’t written three pages since the first heart attack.  Untitled

 

You can open up the list of awesome-sister authors who made this years list by clicking the link AND find out all the detail of the next GCLS convention coming up in Washington DC. Check it out!1418_1665204933743529_7276810380681242403_n

And since I do this usually only once a year – because I agonize over promotion, I’ll keep my eyes closed as I post these. Hope you don’t mind:)
embarrassed

Sometime Yesterday:

sometime yesterday awards

And the first two books of The Sisters of Spirits Trilogy:

the awakening award picture

The Quickening

I am humbled and honored. Truthfully, no one is more surprised about this than me.

I can honestly tell you that I MISS these women!  They didn’t send me Christmas cards, pop in to visit, or come over for dinner anymore. So sad…  However, I DO know them as friends, and mention them to other people (who don’t know they are characters) in normal conversation.

Normal person: I had a house on the beach… (or whatever.)

Me: Oh, that’s wonderful. So does Natalie. (Sometime Yesterday)

Normal person: I own a landscaping business.

Me: Awesome, just like Van Easton. (SY)

Do you want to know what’s even better?

My wife will nod, and smile. “That’s right, honey.”

Can’t get cooler than that:)

I want to thank my readers who send me awesome personal notes and leave blog comments here!

You make my day and it encourages me to keep writing.

Which book have I written that’s your favorite?

Have a wonderful Monday!

P.S.  Ha-ha!  You really don’t want to know how LONG it took me to do the formatting on this blog…  Hours, I tell you. And it’s because I was writing on a desktop (which showed perfectly) and then previewing a tablet blog…

Ah, to be me.

It’s exhausting!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


Thumbtacks on a Rampage

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I’ve written before that I’ve named my muse,. Macy – because Macy rhymes with, Racy – which is my thought process and creative path from which my fiction flows.

I’ve also referred to Macy (and myself) having the attention span of a gnat on crack.

When translated means simply – We both have Attention Deficit Disorder.

It works like this…

ADD

I’m repeating all of this because I’ve received a ton of questions about her.  Bear with me.

Really, hang in there!

Macy has been missing since last June. When I came home from the hospital, I would sit in my office chair, then spring up as if tacks were built into the seat. I don’t know why – but I couldn’t stay in this damn chair. It came to the point I didn’t even want to pass the door way to my office. That’s a damn shame because I had to on the way to the bathroom!

Talk about winding a big fat ball of yarn named, guilt. Then add in a daily dose of insecurity, named: What the hell is wrong with me?

Problem with that – when you ask yourself that question – the brain will tell you exactly what’s wrong with you. I have a long list.

Truth!

I managed to write a few blogs – and maybe a page or two, but without my muse.

Having no muse – or if you’d rather – being encompassed by writer’s block is absolutely no fun at all. None of my awesome characters came to talk to me, nor did they tell me of the adventures they wanted to go on. They absolutely didn’t whisper who they wanted to fall in love with.

Where did all of my fantabulous ideas go? When you’re in the zone and you write notes that look like gibberish – you understand them.

When you’re NOT in that frame of mind – they all look like gibberish.:)

Macy was gone and no where to be found. I couldn’t bribe her, or blackmail her into coming back.

 

I have a sneaking suspicion she was hanging out here…

Macy on vacation

I could only watch as my friends wrote more books and maintained their online presence and it felt as if the world had passed me by – and once again, I was on the sidelines looking in but seemingly unable to participate.

I’ve come on here time and time again – telling you and worse, myself – that this dark time was over.  Call it wishful thinking or whatever you want.

I only knew that after the blog – I went right back to where I was, without Macy.

Until the next blog.

Maybe I’ve called her a bitch once too often.

In the past, I’ve shared awesome advice I was given about getting through a block. They didn’t work for me – I hoped it worked for you!

Or maybe it only worked because I was on a certain story – not trying to build a new one.

 

After another scary trip to the hospital…

Macy showed up unannounced and without fanfare, raring to go.

Moreau,_Gustave_-_Hésiode_et_la_Muse_-_1891

Either she felt sorry for me – or was sunburned and Sangria’d out. But she seems to be here to stay.

There are no more tacks in my office seat. There seems to be no end to the creativity she’s shown.

I may get through this year with a book after all.  It’s well on it’s way.

AND I have a big announcement coming up soon!

Sorry to do that to you.

Well, kinda.

sorry

Just for the record…

How do you get your bitch… um, muse to come home?

 

 

 

 

 

 


Smorgasbord

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I’ve decided to go the safe route when titling my blog. Those of you who know me or read several of my blogs, do  know it’s apt – because half the time (ok, truth – more) I don’t know where I’ll end up in the process:)

many road signs

However, I do know  this isn’t in any way going to resemble a poor me, Macy ran away blog, and I have a creative block, blah, blah. We are well through this now!

*Cue Jim Morrison and Break on Through…  (you’re welcome!)

breaking thru brick wall

I want to take the time to thank ya’ll for being patient with me and reading virtually the same blog every month with new pictures. Now that’s dedication!  Or probably the reason why my views went down dramatically.  I prefer the first option.:)

See? I’m doing it already…  Focus.

Truth is, after I signed with Sapphire Books, I lit a fire under myself and got busy.

The secret is to actually KEEP busy!  That was made so much easier by an author friend who reached out to me. The phone calls started after that – and I can’t tell you how much I appreciate her and the super positive results that followed.  After I got going, the book started flowing. I liken this to the image of a carpet being unrolled in the air and snapped before putting it on the floor. Only it’s a story wrapped up – and not Cleopatra – ha-ha!

carpet ride

This is the original blurb written .

Aislin O’Shea wasn’t looking for a relationship, she was still healing from the last. She certainly wasn’t attracted to fancy pants executive, Ms. Whitman – she wasn’t her type. Stellar career, wealth, exclusive social circle, models vying for her attention: Zane Whitman had it all. Impulsive, free spirited Aislin was not her type. Two women from the opposite side of the tracks. Neither one knows the train is coming.

Wait for it.

Since I’ve written that, I added another twist to the plot. That came when I was in the hospital this last time. Just popped into my head – just the way I like it!

plot twist

So this began to unfold…

My awesome wife was tickled pink because she could hear the keys tapping loudly. I love the snapping sound they make when I’m confident. I would find her peeking around the door with a secret smile on her face before she tells me she missed the sound.

I fell back in love with my characters, Aislin and Zane (Named by her grandfather, a dedicated Zane Grey fan. Her twin brother, Louis, was inspired by his other favorite western author, Louis L’amore).

I’m excited to come into the office after my coffee and watch them grow, or not. Missed opportunities, misunderstandings, and baggage from the past that comes up to bite them in the fanny! What shenanigans will Aislin be up to today?

Oh, and of course, invite them to dinner and talk about them as if they were visiting last night.

warning writers to their own world

At first Sandy was confused when I shared juicy details about Zane and Aislin. It had been a  long time since I have, but being the Saint she is, she caught up quick.  If other people are around they assume I’m gossiping about real people. This is an additional bonus that cracks me up and yet another reason I love my job.

I guess the point is – when I put in the time, great things happen, and I turn on the universal energy which in turn – creates more desire to write. Makes sense to me.

And of course, since I’ve told you I’d be distracted and all over the place, hence the title Smorgasbord. I’ve kept on topic this blog.

What are the odds?:)

Squirrel.

Oops, knew I’d forget something. I also have another project in the works… But – can’t share it yet…  IHave an AWESOME Monday!

Oh, and I’ll leave you with this for the day!

look inside girl

And you’re welcome yet again!

 


GCLS and the Lost Speech

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I write on the fourth Monday of every month, and every month, it feels as if it’s been a year since I’ve done so. Always behind the eight-ball – lagging last…

in line
Better, Awesome Blogs Already Written

 

im-behind-the-8-ball-f

 

There has been many awesome blogs about the GCLS conference from people who attended but again, here is the list of winners – Yay! congratulations to everyone :) 

So, all that is left for me is my original speech that my good friend Jove Belle  apparently forgot to print out!

I’m told she winged it and that she hit all the important points – eventually:)

And I was – in no way – not one iota – upset about it!   At least it was memorable, right?

seal lol

If you need a refresher on The Sisters of Spirits Trilogy, or The Deadening nomination specifically – hit the smiling face!  No really.

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The Deadening cover copy13658910_10154155069090255_6373784274262466772_n

 

 

Original:)

I can’t tell you how honored I am to be included in the 2016 Paranormal Category for, The Deadening: Book Three in the Sisters of Spirits Trilogy!

 

I’m truly sorry that I couldn’t attend this year and visit with all of you.
I could have never written the series or create Shades character without my tribe – And I LOVE my tribe!
We all know Sandy is at the top of that list for keeping me together, and having no hesitation telling me: “Shade would never say that!”
I’d like to thank Bold Strokes Books for publishing Shade’s and Raven’s story and giving a home to the entire Sisters of Spirits Trilogy.
To Shelia Powell – thank you for everything – including your beautiful friendship and the time you spent with me verifying paranormal facts and my very own pop up/pop in ghosts.

 

Victoria Villasenor for handling my author psychosis so gracefully.

 

Jove Belle – For the same, and loving Shade nearly as much as I do!
I am eternally grateful and humbled to the GCLS and members for including my book, The Deadening, in the 2016 Golden Crown Literary Awards.
And last, but most important – thank you to my loyal readers. Thanks for joining The Sisterhood of Spirits with me!


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